- Follow Gothamist on Twitter and like us on Facebook. You can also get the top stories mailed to you—sign up here.
- Mr. "I Did Not Inhale" confirmed that which we all already know: the war on drugs is failing.
- An Aqueduct employee on a bike was fatally struck by a tractor trailer in Queens.
- At least 9 people were injured after a car flipped over in Brooklyn.
- For some reason, Dustin Hoffman kissed one of the One Direction guys last night on Letterman.
- Kim Kardashian had a cat for a couple weeks, but now it's dead.
- On the other hand, Tom Cox wrote a fantastic piece about how his 17-year-old cat is his hero.
- Learn how "Bullshit Mountain" was born on The Daily Show.
- Dallas Cowboys practice-squad linebacker Jerry Brown was killed in a one-car accident early this morning, and his teammate Josh Brent has been charged with intoxication manslaughter.
- Murder suspect found with a dead woman in his bed is GLAD the cops caught him!
- The NY Post story of your nightmares: "Where in Times Square to take each member of your family."
- And finally, cats sure do love hanging out on treadmills:

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