Early Addition: Support Obama Or Be Erased, Obama Ad Warns

Published November 7, 2011

Modified November 7, 2011

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Stupid idiots are still aiming laser pointers at pilots, this time they were flying into LaGuardia with hundreds of lives in their hands when the cockpit was zapped with green light.
Don't worry, that giant asteroid passing by Earth on November 8th won't annihilate us, says science, which is never wrong about these things.
Thousands of people are still without power after that freak Halloween weekend snowstorm.
A Queens woman delivered a baby conceived with her murdered husband's sperm.
A Bronx mom is suing a Kennedy Fried Chicken joint because her son was stabbed after workers turned off the lights and hid during a gang robbery.
Psst, wanna buy 51,000 parking meters? (Scroll down.)
The Obama campaign warns Democrats to support his reelection now—or get disappeared.