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- Here's the official unauthorized Banksy figurine.
- A dog bit a 12-year-old trick or treater...in the face.
- "As for Obama, Clinton trotted out for his pals the same line again and again: ‘He’s luckier than a dog with two dicks.’”
- If I ever headbutt a bear and survive, I hope my family bakes me three traditional pies.
- Somebody tried to smuggle some cocaine-filled pumpkins through the airport.
- Women who narrate audiobook erotica give tips on how to sound sexy.
- Modern Farmer reports on Washington’s Vashon Island, which sound like a marijuana mecca.
- NY Times fooled again by Twitter shenanigans.
- "Safe kissing" is a thing that exists now.
- Local news sportscaster went full-Ron Burgundy during his report last night.
- And finally, a Gamorrean Pug Guard:
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