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- Insane Clown Posse dissect Carly Rae Jepsen's "Call Me Maybe" video.
- Third graders were coached to cheat on state tests at NJ school.
- Man tries to ship himself in a package to girlfriend, man almost suffocates to death.
- Grand Street in Williamsburg has been the target of a rash of burglaries.
- Joss Whedon's S.H.I.E.L.D. TV show is a-go at ABC.
- A Queens family was injured after a chain ladder broke while they fled a house fire.
- SNL has booked Seth MacFarlane and Frank Ocean for their season premiere; Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Daniel Craig will host the next two weeks.
- If you go out drinking with your 4-year-old, you're probably going to be arrested.
- A mysterious good Samaritan saved a fashion student after she fainted and fell onto the subway tracks in Brooklyn.
- A 68-year-old bank employee was fired for "stealing" ten cents...in 1963
- And finally, Darth Vader is no match for...a cute dog:
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