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- Jonathan Safran Foer is writing a new novel about God or something.
- A Muslim couple was kicked out of an Arkansas mall for looking "suspicious," and now they're planning to move.
- Three quarters of private ultra-Orthodox Jewish schools News12 visited in Rockland County are potential firetraps.
- Patrick Dempsey seems to be a little bitter about that time Shonda Rhimes murdered him on Grey's Anatomy.
- This GIF of baby chickens pecking at a BB-8 toy is more important than the rest of today's news.
- Speaking of, the new Star Wars has a kickass female character, but she appears to be missing from some toy sets.
- If you elect Hillary Clinton, she will try to cure Alzheimer's (or so she says).
- A Minneapolis man has been accused of murdering his mother over bedbugs.
- And last but not least, this is what happens when you tickle a penguin:
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