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- For the first time ever, Weird Al's new album debuted at #1 on the Billboard Top 200.
- A brawl between two women at a 7-Eleven included a comb jammed into someone's ear.
- Oh birdies, a traffic light was perhaps not the best place to build a nest.
- In which the AP learns the importance of the comma.
- Model, TV personality and mom Peaches Geldorf died of a heroin overdose.
- New City Council members are staging mock meetings to learn how to be City Council members.
- Coolio's latest song will be released through Pornhub, for some reason.
- And finally, armadillos may look like giant bugs but they still love to play:
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