Tenants at 28 tenement-style apartments on the Upper East Side are being forced to relocate for at least one month, maybe two, so that MTA workers can perform interior repair work on their buildings to accommodate the Second Avenue subway line. And we're jealous! Because to entice these people to move along with no arguments, the MTA has offered them one sweet deal.

Residents have two options: They can agree to stay at the luxury extended-stay hotel Marmara Manhattan on East 94th Street, conveniently located across the street from five of the six affected buildings. The hotel has furnished rooms, a gym, valet dry cleaning, and a 24-hour concierge in a stylish lobby. Or they can take a fat stipend and find their own digs: $5,000 a month if you reside in a studio, $6,000 a month for a one-bedroom, and $9,000 a month for a two-bedroom tenant. The MTA will also pay each person affected by the move a $40 food stipend, and cover the rent and utilities for the apartment you're leaving behind. What, no footman or personal masseuse?

The MTA's total cost for relocating tenants and shoring up the buildings is about $6 million to $8 million, and officials claim they're offering the incentives to avoid delays on the construction of the subway. (Which would be unthinkable!) The MTA also says the stipends are comparable to market rates, but Second Avenue Sagas notes that in non-doorman apartment buildings, an Upper East Side studio goes for approximately $1700, a one-bedroom for $2200, and a two-bedroom for $2800. Meanwhile, merchants along Second Avenue on the UES are struggling to stay afloat during the construction, and 18 businesses have shuttered since the work began three years ago, Crain's reports.