Now that everybody in the school already knows which biddies want to tap which hotties, the Department of Education has condemned Stuyvesant High School's "crush list." Though the tradition of posting a "crush list" goes back years for the school, this year students were able to write names under headings like "I'd Tap That." DOE spokesman David Cantor told the Post, "From what I've seen, the students' lists are essentially harmless, but don't belong in a school display case." But is the title really that bad?
Though the language may be more sexually forward than in previous years, the long lasting repercussions of any admissions are minor, since the seniors are in their last week of school. One student told Fox News, "I'm sure everyone's been curious who their crushes are or who has crushes on them," while another pointed out, "There's one more week left of school, so you can't really make anything of what happened." Unfortunately, all this drama means that in years to come, nobody will be able to do any tapping. Senior-class president Mohammed Rahman said, "There probably won't be a crush list next year."
Stuyvesant alum Phoebe Maltz wrote on her blog four years ago that the "crush list" is one of the school's great traditions, saying, "It’s a chance to find out which of your classmates are the most desirable—a revelation to no one by that point, as Stuyvesant’s conventionally-attractive population is notoriously minute." She also said it helps teenagers figure out their type—she was accused of having a "geek fetish" after posting her list, making Stuyvesant the perfect high school match! Looks like Stuyvesant teenagers will just have to find another way to reach their sexual awakenings. (Sexy prom anyone?)