The reviews are in from this morning's commute, and critics are calling it: "crazy" and "delightful" and "im trapped on the fucking b train im real life gonna CRY."

Due to the potent mix of door and signal problems, B, F and D trains have been a mess all morning, according to the MTA. Presently, the transit authority is warning of "extensive delays" on the F train. Riders tell Gothamist they were stuck underground without air conditioning for close to 45 minutes, and passengers near Roosevelt Island and 63/Lexington say they were forced to evacuate through the front of the train.

A different F train was also cleared at 21st Street—Queensbridge; one observer notes that the crowd was full of students in caps and gowns heading toward graduation.

Meanwhile, a single door problem on a B train earlier this morning seems to have snarled service along much of the line, delaying some people by up to 40 minutes. At least one train offloaded all of its passengers at Grand Street, where riders said there were major crush-loading conditions. Others said they were discharged at Church Avenue.

"They just emptied my b train at Grand street and now the entire train is crowded onto the narrow platform. It's too crowded for me to reach the exit and take a citibike if I wanted," tweeted Leah Golubchick. "MTA, [Governor Cuomo] stop spending money on ads on fare hopping and fix your shit."

She added in a message to Gothamist that the woman in front of her was "saying her other train also deboarded at Church Ave, so this is the second time for her!"

Others reported cascading chaos on nearby lines. Rebecca Fishbein, who used to document this sort of thing professionally, tells Gothamist her northbound Q train was delayed about 15-20 minutes approaching the Manhattan Bridge, and she was eventually informed that a “train went out of service” at Grand Street.

To top it all off, there is currently no southbound Q train service anywhere in Manhattan.

But don't worry, help is on the way. The MTA board meeting is currently in session, where our trusted, transparent bureaucrats are no doubt brainstorming common-sense solutions to improve the customer experience.

Ah, nevermind.