Developers are wasting no time razing Williamsburg's recently closed bar/venue Spike Hill to make way for three levels of retail space.

According to the Wall Street Journal, the low-rise spaces that currently occupy 184-186 Bedford Avenue will become 9,600 feet of pure retail, unsullied by pesky apartments. RedSky, the developers behind the purchase, also snapped up 204-206 Bedford a few blocks away, which will likewise become 11,250 feet of retail space—a total $40 million purchase. What could possibly occupy that much room? Combination Crate & Barrel/L.L. Bean? Combination West Elm/Patagonia? Combination Pottery Barn/Anthropologie? The options are varied and endless!

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(Lauren Tara LaCapra)

The company is asking $400 a square foot for the ground floor and $125 per square foot for the second floor. In 2008, rents were as low as $30 per square foot. Here, you can borrow my artisanal ice pick for your eyeball, just please wipe it down with this organic ultra-fine cheesecloth after; I will need to use it when they go after Turkey's Nest.