When it comes to the various humiliations Donald Trump has caused the country, Hillary Clinton, idiot bloggers who thought he was a big joke and so on and so forth, never forget to include Chris Christie on that list. From the moment a dead-eyed Christie endorsed Trump after getting thoroughly embarrassed in the Republican primary, Trump has found ways to turn Christie, who made his bones as a take-no-shit Jersey tough guy governor, into nothing more than a punchline. And after getting unexpectedly shut out of the White House almost immediately after Trump won the presidency, Christie is reportedly still holding out a sad hope that he'll become a made man any day now.
According to the Post, Christie has told friends that he's "taking a role with the Trump administration," though there's no indication in the story whether his friends have reacted the same way they do when you tell them that the bartender is for sure flirting with you. Whatever the extremely real job awaiting Christie in Valhalla is, the Post's source only said that it wasn't replacing Reince "Thicc" Preibus as chief of staff.
The source told the Post that, in a move where he would retain some dignity, Christie will allegedly "only take something where he is answerable to the president." But the source also threw that dignity in the trash by also telling the Post that Trump told Christie to just be patient, conjuring up the image of Christie excitedly looking at his phone every time it rings to see if it's Donald Trump coming through with his big reward.
Christie's spokesman denied the report to the Post, and the Trump camp also denied the report, when they spoke to Mike Allen for his Axios newsletter. However, when denying it to Allen, the Trump camp also couldn't help but twist the knife a little bit, by going past a normal denial and telling Allen that the report was "100% wrong. The Christie chatter is as always generated by Christieland."
Of course, if you were Chris Christie, you would also be entertaining unhealthy fantasies of flying the coop. For one, there's the fact that a judge ruled a criminal case related to his role in Bridgegate was allowed to proceed in court. And then there's that whole thing where at least a job would be a good reward for Christie getting humiliated by Trump again recently, this time by ordering meatloaf at a dinner date with Trump merely because Trump told him to order it. Sure, meatloaf was a healthy decision, but eating it because President Wario grinned at you from across a table and told you that's what you're eating means there's a price you pay with your mental well-being. Not to mention callers will for sure never let you hear the end of it once you embrace your true destiny and take over for Mike Francesa's show on WFAN.