Chelsea residents should hug their premium full pelt fur blankets a little closer at night—that $8 million dollar penthouse may have SubZero appliances and gold plated toilet seats, but none of that really matters because its doorknobs are totally worthless.

DNAinfo reported today that burglaries in the 10th Precinct are on the rise, particularly at homes with aging, decrepit (but very pretty!) doorknobs, which can be snapped off with the deft flick of even the most foppish wrist.

Get it together, Chelsea. You've already got buildings falling apart for no good reason.