And here is the least shocking news of the day: rents in Brooklyn have continued to rise like a planet inhabited by apes over the last year. When once Brooklyn rents were too damn high, now they are so damn high they have started carving artisanal bongs out of the remnants of the Moonstruck tree because getting high off nature is just more real, man.

According to the latest report from real estate firm Douglas Elliman [PDF], median rental prices in Brooklyn rose 11.6% from this time a year ago, reaching $2,890, the highest point in five years. Average Brooklyn rental prices increased nearly 3% to $3,178. While the average rental price of studios in Brooklyn has decreased nearly 5% to $2,300, the median rental price for studios has increased a whopping 27% to $2,260.

One other interesting tidbit: while prices for one- and two-bedroom apartments have increased in both average and median prices, the price for three-bedroom apartments has gone down quite a bit. Average three-bedroom rental prices have gone down 20% since 2013 to $4,281. There's also been a nearly 50% increase in the amount of three-bedroom units on the market in that period, so that's clearly the way to go if you don't mind sharing space with someone who may or may not have a Tinder addiction.

Of course, we still think you'd probably be better off buying a small island if you have the cash.