Tenants of two buildings in East Williamsburg are claiming that the landlord is using a biker gang to force them from their homes. “It’s like the ‘Hotel Altamont’ over there,” Thomas Hillgardner, an attorney for several residents of 13 and 15 Thames Street tells the Post, presumably before swigging a Tom Collins and adding, "I'll be here all week."

According to Hillgardner, the members of the Forbidden Ones Motorcycle Club throw "rowdy boozefests" at all hours to "terrorize residents and have them surrender their statutory rights under the loft law," which protects tenants of illegally converted living space from being kicked out.

One woman alleges that a biker "slammed" her friend into a concrete wall while another stole her cell phone. “They really own this street,” added another tenant. Meanwhile across town, the biker gang that defined "biker gang" for the world as the manifestation of lawless American lust for violence and debauchery has claimed a single park bench.

The buildings' landlord, Andy Chau, denies using the bikers as leverage to kick tenants out to use the land for more "lucrative" purposes, but that's not what biker Rafael "Tito" Martinez says. “He said, ‘You can stay if you can keep the people out.' " In related news, if our landlord is reading: we're happy to put a baseball card in our bike spokes and keep the Mr. Softee kids at bay for a rent reduction.