The former WPIX reporter who was accused of slapping the Bahamian UN ambassador’s chauffeur over a parking spot was acquitted yesterday. Self-described "bad boy" Vince DeMentri was fired three days after the incident came to light last year, and immediately turned his focus onto getting his job back: "I'm the victim and I'm not the villain and guess what, I need a job," he said, moments after dramatically throwing up his arms in a victory sign.

DeMentri had been charged with misdemeanor counts of attempted assault and harassment, but the testimony of the the chauffeur ended up being his best defense. Chauffeur Hurley Senanayake accused DeMentri of calling him the n-word, an allegation which came as a surprise to the defense, prosecution and judge. DeMentri's lawyer called the the lawsuit an attempt at a payday: "This was absolutely the single worst witness I have ever come across," said Jeffrey Lichtman, whose former clients include John Gotti Jr. The judge sided with him in the end.

"I paid an incredible price. I just want my life back...My life won't be complete until I have my job back," DeMentri added. If Ernie Anastos could make it, then we're sure DeMentri will figure out a way to keep fucking that chicken.