In a harrowing report, CBS introduces us to yet another thing to dread and fear, courtesy of that innovative R&D team at Al Qaeda: Rectal bombs. It's been revealed that an Al Qaeda operative, who last month tried to assassinate Saudi Arabia's counter terrorism chief, detonated explosives in his butt. Abdullah Asieri had arranged a meeting with Prince Mohammed Bin Nayef to talk about a truce, but it was just a ruse to get close to him with his exploding ass.
Asieri was able to get past two sets of airport security, including metal detectors, and spend 30 hours in the close company of the prince's own secret service agents, before detonating the bomb during his meeting with Nayef, who was slightly injured. Naturally, the airport screening process is about to get a whole lot more invasive, unless the TSA just decides to ban assholes entirely. Here's CBS's report: