The allegedly hot NYC Sheriff's deputy who had the Internet clamoring for a stop-and-frisk last week will not put his weapon on display, despite having reportedly been offered a spread by Playgirl. Life is indeed a flowerbed of disappointment.

Apparently, earlier this week the Daily News reported that Instagram star and protector of law Miguel Pimento, whose body-building selfies spawned comments like "I'm a bad girl cuff me and take me to jail" from Internet strangers, had been offered a gig from nakey man website Playgirl.com. "He’s expressed interest in meeting and talking about it,” Playgirl spokesman Daniel Nardicio told the tabloid. And the site wasn't just interested in him bearing arms (sorry!)—they wanted his naked gun (sorry again!) too . “It would have to be full frontal," Nardicio said.

But alas, it appears Playgirl was mistaken, for Pimental says he will not lower his shield. "If it's not completely, completely nude I'd be OK with it," he said. "I've never posed nude and I don't really consider myself a nudist kind of guy." Pimental also told the News that he'd never actually received an offer from the site, but that there were "various people posing as me (online)," and Playgirl likely reached an impostor.

Though it seems everyone's Playgirl dreams are dashed, you can still peruse Pimental's photos on his Instagram page. It's always better to leave a little mystery, anyway.