Oh sure, 50 Shades Of Grey might be perfect fodder for exotic dance parties and awesome Tie Handcuffs Mask Necklaces, but actually finding your very own Christian Grey isn't quite as easy. Today, the Post highlights the story of Frankie Santiago, a 27-year-old S&M enthusiast who was a live-in fetish slave to 53-year-old Manhattan investment-banker Edward Sonderling...until she found out he was cheating on her.

According to their sources, the two were engaged in a relationship for the last three years: “Basically, she was there to serve his sexual needs. She’s his toy, his fetish slave.” The couple—who are known in the community as Althea Lyn and King Eddo—were regulars on Manhattan’s BDSM circuit, where Sonderling would reportedly boast of being a "whipping aficionado." But it all came crashing down on July 29th, when Santiago found out Sonderling had been whipping with someone else after discovering airline tickets for Sonderling’s new partner at the apartment.

Santiago confronted him, and allegedly pulled a kitchen knife and threatened to kill herself. She ended up kicking the front window of his car with her foot. Between July 30th to August 11th, Santiago sent 40 texts to Sonderling, according to the criminal complaint. Messages included: “I hope you and [the new girl] rot in hell;" "I hope karma gets both of you, you rotten piece of s--t;" and “If I ever see you with her I will not hold back. I have nothing to lose. I hope she has a disease you catch.”

Santiago has now been charged with stalking, criminal mischief and aggravated harassment. It might be tough to maintain a successful slave/master relationship in this kooky post-50 Shades world, but you got to hand it to Sonderling—it seems the S&M life can really keep you fit.