Jeremy ShockeyIt's established that the Giants' tight end (ha ha ha) Jeremy Shockey is a big dumb oaf, not to mention being so five years ago (Homo? Who uses that anymore in a non-ironic sense? And dude, you're in professional sports, naked in locker room with men, squeezing each other's asses on the playing field...hey, that's the ticket - maybe Shockey was using homo in a complimentary way, "Hey, that Parcells is a great guy, what a homo!" Okay, maybe not.). Giants coach Jim Fassel does not know what to do with Shockey, as Fassel thinks Shockey is just a big dumb kid. But he'd like Shockey to shut up. Gothamist is divided: Shockey is clearly stupid, but he's such a train wreck, it's almost fascinating to see what else he'll say. He's all the reasons why professional sports may be doomed: Ignorance, stupid bravado, arrogance. The Daily News reported a Maxim interview that makes us wonder if Shockey even has a manager or agent:

"I've had sex with a few people who are famous, but I can't kiss and tell," he says. "I'm a true gentleman, so if you're out there and listening, you can have sex with me and I obviously won't tell anybody - except my buddies."

Shockey says he "definitely" picks up women on the road and is always looking for more.

"A lot of guys have a girl in Dallas. They've got a girl in Arizona. A girl in Washington. I don't have any girls anywhere, so if you you're hot ... and you want to get with me on the road, just send your letters to Maxim or the Giants with a picture," he asks.

Reading this is made us laugh so much that surely it added a month to our lifespan. The sad thing is that there probably are girls who are dumb enough to send in their pictures for a piece of the Shock. Ew.

ESPN on Shockey's antics in context of New York and race.