Gothamist loves Breakup Girl, but who knew we'd see our high school valedictorian listed as the winner of the Breakup Haiku contest from 2000? Gothamist can only wonder what it would be like to get a haiku when breaking up. On Sex and the City, the breakup was via Post-It (Gothamist has only sunk to e-mail dumping, never yellow stickies).

Two of Gothamist's worst breakups: (1) Being locked in L's apartment on 19th street after the discovery of a name on a "to-do" list in our wallet, and not being allowed to leave; and (2) Corner of First Avenue and East 6th Street, Gothamist demanding to break up after B started to say something about "needing space" (we're learning to be quick on the draw). Space. Who are people kidding?