The modern age has brought us many blessings—cupcake dispensers, cake-cutting robots and lubricated ketchup bottles, to name but a few—and now we've got…an automated cocktail machine! A YouTube video of one such magical machine has been making its rounds around the internet. Behold, the Inebriator:

As you can see, the video proclaims that the machine "makes any drink," though we'd be really impressed if it could somehow pull off an Alien Brain Hemorrhage. It does seem well stocked with the appropriate booze-and-mixer accoutrements, but we'll have to give this one a couple tries before we have it whip us up a julep. Meanwhile, stay tuned for Cocktail Machine II: The Mixologist and Cocktail Machine III: The Craft Beer Brewer, which, obviously, grows its own hops.