If we continue to ensure that the Frito Lay factory is running 24/7 and obtain a parcel of deep fried sugar for making guttural noises, there will be consequences: a study conducted by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and Trust For America's Health [PDF] shows that on the country's current path, nearly half of the country could be obese by 2030, with 13 states having an obesity rate of 60% or more. At this point, we don't need a "Nanny," we need a friggin drill sergeant.

If this sounds familiar, it's because a report in the British medical journal The Lancet came to a similar conclusion around a year ago. There are a few signs of hope: obesity in New York City school grades K-8 decreased by 5.5% from 2006 to 2011, and in Philadelphia they dropped from 43% to 37.3% from 2005 to 2011. In fact, all we'd have to do is decrease our body mass index by 5% and we'd save $40 billion in health costs in New York state alone. But hey, all the arctic ice will be gone in four years anyway so who cares about love handles?