On Friday, Manhattan will officially become home to the world's swankiest Denny's. Patrons of the sleek new Financial District diner-cum-lounge will have access to all sorts of unholy pairings unfathomable to your teenage self growing up in Chippewa Falls: Madam, would you care for a Bellini with your Grand Slam? A craft mezcal cocktail to accompany your Pancake Puppies? Looking to impress clients or a mid-level courtisan? Look no further than the $300 Grand Cru Slam, which includes two Grand Slam breakfasts, a bottle of Dom Perignon Vintage 2003 champagne and a "bartender high five," if you're OK with allowing your manicured hands contact with the lower castes like that.

The space itself is impressive, though that particular achievement cannot be attributed to Denny's, unlike the Fried Cheese Melt. The building at 150 Nassau, the bottom floor of which Denny's now occupies, was built in 1895 and was awarded landmark status, so the raw materials were promising from the beginning.

Still, Denny's did well by not tarnishing all that history with shitty pastel bathroom prints and plastic ivy peeking over frosted glass partitions—it's hard to know for sure from the photos, but the decor seems classy, relying heavily on dark wood, rich leather(y looking) booths, exposed brick walls and a pleasing copper tin ceiling. Is there a prim bearded gentleman just out of frame, turning the yellowed pages of a leather-bound first edition with one hand while twiddling a buffalo chicken strip with the other? Probably!

More pressingly, who will be the first person to employ a mozzarella stick as a Gin Fizz garnish? On the scale of one to ten, how hard is it to scrub Keystone Light vomit from exposed brick? What in God's name is a Philly cheesesteak bake and can you recommend a wine pairing? To think anyone ever thought this was a bad idea.

150 Nassau Street, opens Friday