Apparently the new flavor of Cronut™ being offered by the Dominique Ansel Bakery in July is "blackberry." Here's what we think about that.
Cronut Be Not Proud
Cronut, be not proud, though some have called thee
"insanely addictive," or "must have," thou art not so.
For those whom thou thinks your creme inject'd dost overflow
Eat not, poor Cronut, for your outrageous queue I'll never see.
Rose vanilla, blackberry, which to me
Are all the same; then from thee much more hype must flow
And soonest our esteemed food bloggers with thee do go
Rest their carpal-tunnel'd bones on a post about $100 delivery.
Thou art slave to Whimsy, Twitter, tourists, and desperate men,
And dost with Gimmick, Cliché, and Diabetes dwell,
And Doughnut Plant and Atlas Ghandis can make us smile as well
And better than thy Soho'd stroke. Why swellst thou then?
One more hot month of buzz past, we wake eternally,
And insufferable hand-wringing and hash'd tags shall be no more; Cronut, fucking die!
