Around 805 million people around the world are starving on any given day, but if you can fit a 30-pound burrito into your corpus, one Park Slope taqueria will award you a ten percent stake of the company. That's capitalism?!?

Don Chingon, located at 216 Flatbush Avenue, is giving patrons one hour to consume the rough equivalent of a three-year-old child, if the child was a) made out of steak, chicken, pork, rice, beans, salsa and folded into a tortilla and b) holding a ghost pepper margarita, which must also be ingested as part of the bargain. For them, it's not a bad idea—as a business owner, I want the human grizzly bear on my team, thank you very much.

You're not alone if you're squicked by this grotesque marketing gimmick, but the city contains multitudes, and one of them is a Daily News editor with an Instagram account who endeavored to eat the whole thing. As you can see, the burrito holds enough food to fill a mass grave, handily.

This is what a 30-pound burrito looks like -- before I eat 30 pounds of it!

A photo posted by Gersh Kuntzman (@brooklyngersh) on

He failed.

And so will you!

We reached out to Gersh Kuntzman for confirmation that he did, in fact, eat 26 pounds of the burrito. He likely won't respond, because he might be dead.