When we last left alleged Lucali stabber Battista "Benny" Geritano, he was making an obscene gesture with his sandwich to a Daily News photographer, presumably in celebration that the attempted murder charges were dropped against all parties involved. However, the reputed mobster tested positive for marijuana while on parole, and now faces up to two years in prison despite allegedly using a Whizzinator while he submitted his samples. Maybe there was something in his sandwich?

For the uninitiated, a Whizzinator is a realistic, synthetic penis that allows the user to urinate for a drug test using someone else's clean urine, so that you may pursue your lifestyle with impunity. According to the Daily News, samples that Geritano sent to a drug treatment facility were clean, whereas samples that authorities collected themselves tested positive. "In our facility, the room is mirrored and we observe the actual submission of the urine into the bottle," a probation officer testified at Geritano's hearing yesterday.

Though the officer said he had "no factual evidence supporting" the theory that Geritano used a Whizzonator, given how…uh…lifelike they are (deeefffinitely NSFW) he'd probably have to feel the "most realistic prosthetic in the market" to know the difference.