Anytime a friend tells you they spent their night partying at Lit Lounge in the East Village, you know what it means. (Dancing, sweating, blow in the bathroom. Repeat.) Anytime a friend tells you they're moving into/visiting McKibbin lofts in Bushwick, you know what it means. (Parentally-subsidized rent, blow in the bathroom. Avant-garde sweating.) And now, these disparate locales are finally merging into one awesome hydra, and it will And pastries? What in hell is going on around here?

According to Bedford + Bowery, the owners of Lit are getting together with Trash Bar owner Aaron Pierce and Rafik Video owner Mindy Wyatt to create a terrifying new restaurant-club hybrid at 248 McKibbin, meaning we must all steel ourselves against the inevitable flood of "want-to-come-check-out-my-art, oh-I-live-upstairs" pick up lines that will assault all who enter the bi-level venue.

The coffee-and-pastry portion of the space, to be called Currant Cafe, will be safely contained upstairs—you can crawl there after a night of raging in the downstairs club, a "raw basement" that will boast 17-foot-tall ceilings and regularly host "DJs and parties." If using a freshly baked croissant to blot the blood streaming from your coke-ravaged septum isn't the very definition of the New Bushwick, nothing is. There will also be a platform for go go dancers.

Currant Cafe is slated to open on March 16; the club will follow sometime in September. Bring condoms.