It's true that this video of a squirrel devouring an avocado with both hands isn't for everyone.
Devastating critiques have been penned on this very blog about our pathetic compulsion to gawk, even for two seconds, at one of the millions of rodents eating one of the billions of pieces of refuse that blanket this rancid town. I don't think I've ever seen a New York City squirrel eating anything but trash.
And the last time many of us felt a drop of unambiguous joy from viral vermin, our cheer was poisoned by doubt, and finally cynicism. Pizza Rat was the original Fake News.
So why do we feel forced to impute some kind of meaning to something so pedestrian, so pointless? This squirrel isn't even eating the avocado like a human being would—clumsily plunging a dull Ikea knife into its flesh, dumping the squishy halves onto some pita chips. It's drilling into the thing face-first with raw animalism, rind and flesh together. Why not just watch a video of a dog whizzing on a curb, its canine face expressionless, its owner staring at their phone, taking a picture a squirrel eating a churro, as dark, foul liquid drains into the sewer.
On the other hand, this squirrel is totally chowing down super hard on an avocado. Look how happy it is!
Isn't that enough?
Courtesy of reader Henry and his dog Almond.
