If enough NYT trend pieces have somehow not yet convinced you that Williamsburg's Northside is just one elevated park away from descending into total Meatpacking madness, the neighborhood is reportedly getting its first "proper" nightclub. Because at this point, oh fuck it.

The projected 452-person-capacity club, called Output, will join the ranks of those other red-roped bastions of stiletto-heeled nightlife like Pacha and District 36, featuring a massive main dance floor, rooftop, restaurant and lineup packed with house-and-techno-spinning DJs. And, appropriately, it'll be located at 74 Wythe Ave, right next door to the Wythe Hotel, whose noted swank factor and upscale rooftop bar wasn't the first drop in the neighborhood's death-to-bohemia bucket, but certainly helped transition Williamsburg's vibe from to-go margarita-cool to $15 vodka soda-cool.

On the bright side, though, Lindsay Lohan's got an even hipper place to punch someone in the face now, so at the very least we can all look forward to gratuitous paparazzo shots of her crying in handcuffs outside Brooklyn Bowl.