In what can easily be categorized as "inevitable," USA Today is reporting that pretty much everything is being slapped with the label "artisan" these days, because people hate themselves just a tiny bit less when they eat "artisan" Doritos and Häagen-Dazs for dinner on the couch.

"Artisan," just so we're all clear, is defined as "a person or company that makes a high-quality, distinctive product in small quantities, usually by hand and using traditional methods." With that in mind, meet the latest products hopping on ye olde marketing bandwagon: Domino's meta-Artisan pizza, Tostitos Artisan Recipes chips and Starbucks Artisan Breakfast Sandwiches. Mmm! You can smell the traditional methods from a mile away!

"The word artisan suggests that the product is less likely to be mass-produced," said Tom Vierhilet, a researcher from Datamonitor. "It also suggests the product may be less processed and perhaps better tasting and maybe even be better for you." Ah, yes, the sweet power of suggestion. Another suggestion: for those who love handcrafted, artisan goods from fourth-generation traditional craftsmen, head on over to Brooklyn! We hear it's the most artisan city on the planet these days.