"Atlanta, GA—Cinnabon, Inc. has introduced a new minty treat—the Oreo® Mint Chillatta™. The new specialty beverage is available now at participating Cinnabon® bakeries. This creamy Chillatta is the perfect blend of sweet cream, Oreo cookies, mint flavoring and a ribbon of chocolate sauce, topped with whipped cream and crumbled Oreo cookie pieces. For a limited time only."
Three months ago...
A dozen men and women in suits sit around a large circular table carved to look like a Cinnabon. The mood is tense
Cinnaboard Member 1: OK people, Don's not in his Cinnabest mood today, so we have to think of some better ideas for our spring product line before he gets here. Dina, I liked your BenzoBon proposal, but there's no way Pfizer can make that icing cost-effective.
CB2: We need to get out from under this stigma that we're a boutique product only sold at airports to—
CB3: Registered sex offenders?
CB2: What?! No! I meant people who don't care about their—
CB3: Didn't you see that insane 60 Minutes segment last week? Apparently we're incredibly popular with—
CB1: All right, enough! This is all CinnaNegativity, OK? We're just spinning our bons, here, people. We need ideas! What about a new beverage?
CB4: Well sir, our Chillatta fleet seems to be selling fine, but we've noticed in the focus groups that people are confused by the word "Chillatta."
CB1: Confused how? More confused than our target customer is supposed to be?
CB4: They don't know whether it's a coffee drink or a dessert drink, or if they're actually at Dunkin Donuts.
CB2: Maybe we need something bolder, some other trusted brand to help us cut through the noise.
Door bursts open to reveal CinnaCEO Don "The Bon" McDonaugh
Don: CRISCO FIIIIIIIIIGHT!
Don tosses globs of shortening around the room as boardmembers laugh and duck behind their chairs and playfully throw scalding hot icing back at their fearless leader
Don: [Wiping tear from eye] Hoo boy, were ya'll scared? Betcha ya'll were scared. I told Tony to make sure you were shittin' yerselves when I walked in here.
CB1: Worked like a charm as usual, boss.
Don: So what we got here? Who's our CinnaProm Queen this spring?
CB3: Sir we were thinking a Chillata collaboration with…
Air is thick with tension and shortening fumes as boardmembers lean in nervously
CB3: A Chillata collaboration with Oreo.
Don: I love it! Get Nabisco on the CinnaPhone. We're gonna make a billion dollars!