Call us old fashioned or uncouth, but coffee isn't nearly enough to take the edge off in this humidity: we demand margaritas. Or, canned malt beverages that are designed to taste like spirits but are actually 8% ABV Frankendrinks. After reading HuffPo's raving "fairly palatable" review, we've been prowling bodegas and Duane Reades in Manhattan and Brooklyn for Bud Light's new

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concoction, Bud Light Lime-A-Rita, but have come up short. We even asked one large beer distributor in New Jersey if they stocked it. "We tasted it and decided not to keep it in stock," a clerk told us. Your loss: you have to put Hennessy in it to unlock the magic.

Besides just being an all-around beneficent, loving company, why did InBev decide to delve into the canned sugarbooze market? Bud Light's vice president Mike Sundet explains: "Beer drinkers were already mixing Bud Light Lime into margaritas to create ‘beer ritas’; Lime-a-Rita just adds a new level of convenience by providing a beverage with the perfect balance of flavors." Previously we felt bad for kicking those people out of our parties, but now they can just get a sixer of this stuff and watch Vin Diesel movies.

Have you had this stuff? Where can we find it? How much would you pay to see a one-man show dedicated to the tragicomic search for the world's most "perfect" margarita? $60? $80?