We've already learned so much about the fascinating slang of state-mashing, wall-building, America First, Breitbart aficionados' subculture, you'd think there was nothing else left to learn. But Samantha Bee took a deep dive into the Deep State, one of the far-left and far-right's favorite conspiracy fever dreams, to try to figure out just what sort of misinformation is being drilled into our president's gullible eye holes via cable news networks.
"[Sean Spicer] wants you to believe that these rogue deep-state infiltrators are poison-blooded Mole People and not just bland paper pushers who locked into government jobs with benefits," Bee said. Instead, Bee suggested we all think about federal employees as terrified passengers on a bus that’s "now being driven by a feral paranoid monkey."
"They’re not trying to kick him out of the drivers seat," she continued. "They know we chose the monkey to be the bus driver because Hillary used email, and is a woman—and they respect that. They’re just trying to turn the wheel slightly while the monkey is masturbating, so we don’t run over a cliff. And, frankly, even the monkey should be in favor of that."
Bee also checked in to see how Democrats are handling life after that "mild setback" in November. She found that the "Resistance" has been doing a lot more than just resisting Trump—they've also resisted showing up to vote in major elections. She was particularly horrified that just less than 12 percent of voters turned out for the LA mayoral race: "That's less than the percentage of Los Angeles that turned out to audition for the Mr. Belvedere reboot," she said. "Were you too busy periscoping your avocado toast from the set of your web series to ensure that [Eric Garcetti] didn't wind up in charge of your city?"
She also focused on Steve King for her recurring segment, "What Does A White Dude Have To Say To Get Fired."
And if you're craving more Bee, she announced she's hosting a "Not the White House Correspondents’ Dinner” event several hours before the annual black-tie gala. As reported by The Hill, the invitation states the event will feature "bottomless cocktails and assloads of fancy fingerfoods,” followed by a taping of Full Frontal.
Also, Time Out New York has a cover story on Bee declaring her "Woman of the Year." Why they're giving out year-end awards in March, we'll never know.
— Time Out New York (@TimeOutNewYork) March 16, 2017