The biggest problem with Justin Bieber isn't that he took a spill while trying to ollie some stairs out front of Madison Square Garden. Wipeouts happen, brah. The biggest problem is that he did it while wearing a pair of drop-crotch leather pants so deeply hideous their designer should be jailed for war crimes. I get that they're "his thing," but Christ on a cracker.

But you don't become one of the world's most important pop stars/tattooed penises by just up and quitting every time you humiliate yourself in front of an assembled crowd of tweens—had that been the case, he would probably have packed it in after puking on stage mid-performance back in 2012, which yielded one of the most significant human achievements of the last decade: The Taiwanese Animated Barf Vid.

Are those...the same pants?