A 4-year-old child weaseled her way into a stranger's wedding after manipulating an unsuspecting couple at City Hall, using her sweet, earnest face and a charming handmade sign to obscure the fact that she sorely lacked even the basic qualifications required to launch a career as flower girl.
Brooklyn resident Annabelle Earl, 4, has little going for her by way of marketable wedding skills: Her resume lacks the experience for any position more senior than "unpaid onlooker" or, at most, "flatware strategy intern," and an exhaustive Internet search reveals nary a Twitter presence nor LinkedIn account.
But despite her paucity of formal training in floral design and despicable lack of fine motor skills, Earl summoned a seemingly endless reserve of guile and shameless flaunting, which she, along with her mother, Kim, unleashed upon the thrifty couples at the City Clerk's office in Manhattan. NBC New York has the story:
Annabelle surveyed the couples, chose one and approached with the proposal.
"The woman said, 'No thank you,' and I thought, 'Goodness, this is going to be a long day,'" Earl said.
Annabelle was undeterred. She pointed to another couple and they walked over. These lovebirds were game.
"She was too adorable to say no to, and we thought it would be fun to make her day as well as ours," said the bride, who did not want to be identified.
Earl's story is just one example of the gross sense of entitlement inherent to post-Millennials, known as "Generation Z." Symbolic Office Millennial Rebecca Fishbein shares her disgust with America's new Most Reviled Generation: "These Gen Z kids have no imagination," she griped. "When I was a kid, if I desired to attend a wedding, I just made my Belle Barbie doll marry my Aladdin Barbie doll (he had no head, though)."
Proving further that Earl is little more than a short, glove-wearing narcissist, reports reveal that the position of flower girl wasn't even her primary dream—the entitled self-seeker initially wished for a "rainbow unicorn for a pet, a real one."
Congratulations, Annabelle. Can't wait to see your name again, featured prominently in a Times Sunday Styles piece headlined, "For Today's 11-Year-Olds, No Shame In Living At Home."