Jimmy Fallon and Paris Hilton on SNL

Rumors didn't let America down: Paris Hilton did make an appearance on Saturday Night Live last night. Dressed in a sharp, slightly sexy (but, let's face it, extremely demure for her), Paris Hilton appeared polite, a little nervous, but overall funny in a classic double entendre exchange with Jimmy Fallon during Weekend Update. Kudos, SNL writers and talent bookers, job well done. Here is the unofficial Gothamist transcript:

Tina Fey: Paris Hilton is a name that's on everyone's lips these days. Here now in an exclusive interview with Jimmy Fallon in Paris Hilton.
Jimmy Fallon: Thanks for coming on.
Paris Hilton: Nice to be here.
JF: So, we agreed, we won't be discussing the scandal that's been in the papers the past couple weeks.
PH: I appreciate that.
JF: We want to find about you, Paris Hilton. Your family...the Hiltons own hotels all around the world.
PH: Yes, in New York, London, Paris.
JF: Wait, there actually is a Paris Hilton?
PH: Yes, there is.
JF: Is it hard to get into the Paris Hilton?
PH: Actually, it's a very exclusive hotel, no matter what you've heard.

JF: I hear the Paris Hilton is very beautiful.
PH: I'm glad that you've heard that.
JF: Is there double occupancy at the Paris Hilton?
PH: No.
JF: Is the Paris Hilton very roomy?
PH: It might be for you. But most people find it very comfortable.
JF: I'm a VIP, I might need to go through the back entrance.
PH: Doesn't matter who are you – it's not going to happen.
JF: Fair enough, okay. I throw a lot of events. Do they have ballrooms there?
PH: We do.
JF: Great, I'd love to have my balls held by the Paris Hilton. Sounds awesome. I'd like to check into the Paris Hilton.
PH: I don't think you can.
JF: Really? I'd only be able to stay there a minute and a half...two minutes, tops.
PH: Good luck.
JF: Paris Hilton!

Gothamist was also struck that the musical guest was Pink, who sang her single, "Trouble" (I'm trouble/ Yeah trouble now/ I'm trouble ya'll/ I disturb my town; lyrics).

And we're waiting for the crew at whatevs.org to file their review, but they weren't optimistic about this episode. Gothamist thought Al Sharpton was decent enough (low expectations help), considering he was bolstered by the presence of the brilliant Tracy Morgan. However, it was depressing because as many of the skits became black–focused, it showed how we really don't see the black performers consistently (same goes for the Halle Berry hosted episode); many of the white players only appeared in a rather amusing sketch about the other Democratic candidates watching Al on SNL.