The Idiotarod is back, and for the first time ever will be held in Trump's U.S. of Idiocracy. The event will go down on January 28th, announces the Department of Homeland Absurdity, who just want to "make America fun again." As usual, the starting point and route will not be announced until go time.

This is the 13th annual Idiotarod, and while some years saw diminished participation, the past few years have seen renewed creativity from the idiots involved. In hopes of an over-the-top turnout, please be inspired by these photos of the best costumed teams of years past, and start planning your own. For those who are new to this, here is how you can participate, and please try to be even 1/8 as good as Team Danger Zone.

Members of the public who wish to make a stand for all that is ridiculous-in-a-good-way should complete the following steps:

1. Join the IdiotarodNYC group on our super secure Facebook page. Here, you will see all current announcements with complete confidence that there are no Russian spies hacking into your sensitive communiques. You can also use this platform for some psychological warfare in advance of the big day.

2. RSVP for the event. This counts as two-factor security as far as IDIOT Labs is concerned.

3. Email IDIOT Labs at ** to obtain an official participant request form. Please exercise patience, as we know it may be both your only exercise and your only virtue. We've been very busy moving our research data to offshore facilities, as we've no idea what will happen if Dick Cheney takes over.

As established in prior years, there is a zero-tolerance policy regarding food throwing and any other behaviors that put the non-racing population or property at risk.

Also: have fun. Everyone should be trying to have fun right now.