Tonight, Jared Leto invites you to Bushwick, where he will be hosting an intimate one-man show, according to Bedford + Bowery. The small engagement will take place inside the old 3rd Ward space at 195 Morgan Avenue, and even though it's all just hours away, there are still tickets on sale :( :( :( :(

Maybe it's the $300 price tag? Maybe it's the Jared Leto.

Below is a list of what you get should you decide to go all in—and we should note, ALL profits go to charity, which is nice. Leto visited Haiti in 2011, calling the trip “epic and unforgettable," and that seems to be what this event is all about.

  • A signed copy of Haiti, a photo book by Jared Leto (first 50 orders only)
  • An acoustic song performed by Jared Leto
  • Photograph with Jared Leto
  • Admission into Haiti: The Journey is the Destination, By Jared Leto (a discussion of the book and his trip)
  • A lock of his beard hair*
  • A stroke of his head hair*
  • 3 seconds of piercing blue eye contact*
  • A true understanding of the absurdity and sadness of celebrity*

Also: you could just livestream the event for $4.99+.

*This is something that we made up, but YOU NEVER KNOW.