Late night talk show hosts just got four years of material they never wanted. Donald Trump will be our next President, and Colbert is almost physically losing his voice he's got so much to say about it. Where Seth Meyers tried to be nice, Colbert is giving it to us straight: this sucks. Last night, he delivered a 16-minute post mortem of election season and America as we know it.
I'm not sure what to believe about anything anymore. I wouldn't want to be alone right now.
We've got four very interesting years in front of us. I don't know about you but I did not get a lot of sleep last night. There's no way around it, this is what it feels like when America's Great Again. I was hoping it would feel better, because this sucks. It suuuuucks. We have to accept that Donald Trump will be the 45th President of the United States. It's like a dream state... all day I've had to remind myself this is real.
Whatever the GOP is saying, I have a feeling they might be feeling the same way. Because remember, the Republican party spent almost the entirety of this election in panic, trying to stop Trump from becoming their nominee.
You know who is taking this strangely well? Hillary Clinton. Even though the possible first female president lost to a crotch-grabbing beauty pageant owner. How are you already accepting this? Did you pay extra for the fast pass through the five stages of grief? Acceptance is the last one.
He also addressed those who are talking about moving to Canada, telling them not to get up from the dinner table: "You don't get to flee the country when things get rough here, being an American citizen is like being family."
Later in the show, Triumph the Dog showed up, explaining why we didn't see these results coming: "It's the elitists that didn't see it. You underestimated Trump. You underestimated the voters... people are blaming the election on voters being 'stupid,' which I think is very unfair to the racists."
