Last month, we felt a real kinship to Tom Hanks when he did the most average, relatable thing possible: hogged seats on the 1 train. We had some fun with Hankspreading, but overall, we gave him a well deserved thumbs-up for generally being a down-to-Earth straphanger. But it seems Hanks has a bone to pick with us, and the entire Internet, over the accusations, and he let his feelings be known last night during halftime at a Knicks game.
"Hey internet, back off!" - Tom Hanks #Knicks
— MSG Networks (@MSGNetworks) March 4, 2015
Watch the full video below.
"I had an argument with The Internet because there I am on the subway, and someone says 'Oh, Hanks is doing the manspread, he's taking up too much space on the subway,'" Hanks emphatically explained, inadvertently inventing a new dance craze Do The Manspread. "I wanna say, 'Hey Internet, that subway car was half empty, I'm not a guy who is gonna take up space!' There were like 14 seats that were free. So all I was [doing] was relaxing on the train ride uptown. So hey Internet, back off!"
Much like his relationship with Wilson, this is complicated, so let's go through this point by point: we did not once accuse of Hanks of manpreading. We (accurately) pointed out that he was being a subway seat hog. ("A ruthless seat hog. Albeit, the most relatable seat hog in NYC, but still.") Just because the subway car was half empty doesn't change the fact that technically speaking, he was taking up two seats. That's against the law, no matter whether you're a big shot Hollywood celebrity or a talented recording artist and Instagrammer.
Because we still think Big is the most honest movie about the dangers of antique arcade fortune teller machines, we completely believe Hanks when he says he would never have done this. And there's nothing wrong with relaxing on the subway! But because we still get "That Thing You Do" stuck in our heads occasionally, he must be held accountable in some way.
Regardless, we're flattered Hanks is such a fan of Gothamist, and we're here to talk some more about this issue if you're out there, Mr. Hanks. We have a very good track record of communicating with people featured in our posts. Feel free to bring Billy Paxton and Ronnie Howard if you please!
And don't even try to tell us this wasn't being directed specifically at us, especially not when Hanks was sitting next to fellow beloved subway spirit animal Kevin Bacon.
— Amy Macdonald (@Amy__Macdonald) March 4, 2015