Perhaps nowhere is the divide between those with power and those without more starkly defined than on the Williamsburg Bridge, where the darkness from the Lower East Side creeps exactly halfway across the East River to Brooklyn, coming to an abrupt halt at the dazzling lights of Kings County—a fantasy land where honkey-tonk bars stay open all night, the picture shows serve beer at your seat, and every man, woman, child, and Labradoodle takes three hot showers a day and flushes their toilets twice for good luck.

But should you attempt a pilgrimage to this futuristic promised land, beware: the darkness on the Manhattan side of the bridge is treacherous. Whether you are on foot or bicycle, it can be hard to detect the many speeding cyclists as they zoom out of the darkness, at least not until the sound of their spinning wheels is almost on top of you. (Check out this illustrative .gif.) So stay to one side and keep moving toward the light, where a gleaming paradise of refrigeration and televised entertainment await! We even saw Looper last night in a movie theater. Remember those?