Indie rock band The Virgins has been practicing diligently in the East Village to prepare for CMJ, and "some" local residents say the group is turning their tranquil gentrified oasis into a cacophonous dystopia where musicians play their deafening rock and roll music at all hours of the night between the hours of 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. But still, what do they think this is, Brooklyn?! Oh, wait—even shuffleboard is too noisy for gentrifying Brooklyn these days.

To clarify, when we say "some" think The Virgins shouldn't practice in the East Village, we're referring to two people who've spoken to reporters who attended the Ninth Precinct Community Council Tuesday night. DNAinfo and the Post both report that ONE disgruntled resident complained to cops at said meeting. "I think they are so full of themselves they keep their window open," said the resident, who is 25-years-old, according to DNAinfo. “It’s like clockwork, every day between 4 and 7," she added, the Post reports. “It’s been three weeks straight without a break. Some of us work at home.” Typical inconsiderate, punctual rock stars—can't they at least hire some tiny violinists to accompany them?

DNAinfo goes on to imply that deli owner Vick Singh is also a tangential victim of the racket. ''My customers come and say, 'How can you take it all day?" Singh asks. But the Post was hot on DNAinfo's heels, and they got this quote from Singh, the owner of Sam's Deli & Grocery near East Seventh Street: “It doesn’t bother me . . . Some people like it and stand outside and listen while looking at the window. They even dance."

Whatever, that didn't stop the Post from publishing a, uh, story with the headline "East Village ‘house’ band uproar! Apt. rockers rile E. Village." To be fair, unlike DNAinfo, the tabloid at least got ONE other person to go on record against the damn Virgins. “I think it’s presumptuous that they think we want to hear it,” said Karen B., a saleswoman who works from her apartment next door and sounds suspiciously like the same anonymous neighbor who complained at the Precinct meeting. But hey, that's just speculation; we're going to withhold judgement on East Village Virgin Noise Nightmaregate until neighbor Viane Delgado weighs in.