If you had to do the whole Desert Island List thing but instead of your favorite albums you had to bring cast members of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, you would probably just choose the solitude scenario that made Tom Hanks befriend a volleyball in Castaway because those are some crazy bitches on that show. In this week's very special episode, we see a chinchilla-clad Teresa Giudice chase after drama-whore Danielle Staub as she tries to escape Guidice's Mean Girl mind games, which, let's be honest, never had a chance at working.

Anyway, for those not tuned in, there was a fight which got somewhat physical when another housewife's daughter, Ashley Holmes, grabbed Staub's hair as she fled from Guidice—and as one might guess, you can't grab a housewife's head of hair without ending up with a weave in your hand. (Flip through this slideshow for a full recap of the incident.) Later, Ashley defended herself to the police by saying, "technically, I didn’t grab her hair, I grabbed her extensions, so it’s really not a part of her." Here's a clip (full episode here):

All caught up? So now, according to NJ.com, Staub is planning on suing Teresa Guidice (who is bankrupt) and Ashley Holmes (who is just morally bankrupt) for assault and battery. Is anyone else surprised this is the first reality show hair-pulling lawsuit?