Untitled Still-Life by Brian Ballone

Hopefully all of you penis artists out there saw our announcement earlier this month about the big penis painting competition, because if you didn't, this is going to burn a little.

To recap, off-Broadway sensation Puppetry of the Penis held the contest recently, which aimed to celebrate art created by the aforementioned male organ. The inspiration: Pricasso, the leading name in penis painting. The prize: one of Pricasso's original works. And finally, the winner (just announced!): Brian Battone, the man who created the above still life with just his penis and a little bit of paint.

Judge David J. Foster explained the decision, saying, "competition was stiff, but Mr. Ballone’s work stood out from the crowd. This work, so full of color and whimsy, is a brilliant example of penis artistry at its finest.” Meh, those blueberries look a little small.