Last month, the NY Times reported that a TV show featuring former White House communications director Anthony Scaramucci and Michael Avenatti, the lawyer who is suing Donald Trump on behalf of Stormy Daniels, was being pitched to cable networks. At the time, it sounded like a terrible idea that no one wanted—and yesterday, we got proof that it is a terrible idea that no one wants during a joint appearance on Late Show with Stephen Colbert.
If this was supposed to be a backdoor pilot for The Natti & The Mooch: The Show—complete with them testing potential catchphrases like "are we gonna whine or are we gonna talk?" (cue the wine!)—then it was a miserable failure. Or at least a miserable experience to watch. Normally, I'd recommend you just click the button below and watch for yourself, but I strongly advise you don't snort their shtick up directly. You can practically smell the spray tan bullshit through the computer screen.
"Let me say two things: I don't have a lot of rules in my life, but one of the rules is I never do a show with a guy whose first name is 'The,'" Avenatti bantered stiffly. "See, I actually thought we were doing a show, and it was going to be the male version of Thelma and Louise," Scaramucci bantered stiffly in response. That is the peak of their banter. I suffered through watching both of these clips so that some of you could avoid my fate.
In between the smug, insider-y "discussion" about all things Trump, Avenatti got one decent line in when asked about Michael Cohen's legal woes: "I think Michael Cohen is in a very, very bad spot. And I think the president is in a very, very bad spot. Because this is what happens when you trust your innermost secrets to a moron."
Later they talked about Trump's lies and the "dazed and confused" Rudy Giuliani. Scaramucci defended Trump over Russia and both men offered their predictions about when and how the Trump presidency might end, and that's it. Now you don't have to waste 17 minutes watching this crap. Be free my children.