Oh, the Internet. You provide so many people with so many wonderful outlets to showcase their, uh, hidden talents. Which is to say, we'd like you to meet Allen Samuels, a 55-year-old Atlantic City casino executive who really just wants to rap. So badly he went and hooked up with a video production company to make a video under the name A. Samuels and here is his first single: "Livin De Life." You'll want to watch this before we continue:
So, where to begin with this one, right? Do we want to discuss Samuels' posse of kids walking through TriBeCa? The serious intro with the terrible French accent? Samuels smoking in a studio? Rapping in Times Square? Rhymes like "It ain't about the Asians, it ain't about the Jews/It ain't about the Christians, or Muslims, yo fools?" The random celebrity cameos (a photo of Shaq holding Samuels! TriBeCa Grill honcho Drew Nieporent)? In the end after watching this video all that we are really sure of is that Samuels is very confident that he is, uh, living some kind of life. Also that he probably shouldn't quit his day job if he wants to keep it up.