Forget about the flying (and the falling); one of the best effects in the beleaguered Broadway musical Spider-Man: Throw Taymor From the Train Turn Off the Dark is the reverse-perspective scene where the back of the stage is transformed into a distant NYC streetscape, which the audience sees as if they're gazing down from the top of the Chrysler Building with Spidey and the Green Goblin. It's a simple effect, but a dazzling one. Of course, everyone's a critic, even the folks in charge of the Empire State Building, who seem to be a tad jealous that the Chrysler Building got the spotlight instead of them.

"Spider-Man" finally "officially" opens Tuesday night (the production has at last been "frozen"—show-biz lingo for "no more changes"), and the producers requested the Empire State Building change its lights to Spider-Man's colors (red and blue) to mark the momentous occasion. The Empire State Building will pretty much tart itself up for anybody—hell, they even changed their lights for the atrocious hippie refugee catastrophe that is "Furthur"—but because of the Chrysler building snub, they're not playing ball.

The Post reports that officials at the Empire State Building demanded that producers change the set from the Chrysler Building to the Empire, or no lights for you! "We love Spider-Man, but the Empire State Building is the world's most famous office building and the icon of the New York City skyline, and omitting it from the set isn't the first misstep the 'Spider-Man' musical has made," one source at the Empire State Building told the tabloid. Oh no source didn't!

Multiple people involved with the $70 million musical said they're not about to give in to the Empire State Building's ransom demands. "How ludicrous. We're a week away from opening," one crew member told the Post. "We're not going to be changing the set." Another asked, "Do you know what all these sets cost? It would cost a fortune to change it, and there just isn't enough time. Also, the Chrysler Building is an integral part of the show."

Also, let's face it, the Chrysler Building is the aesthetically superior skyscraper. ESB, honey, we get that it's cold there in the Chrysler's shadow, and we understand why you're envious, but green is NOT a good look for you.