What to do when your life's chief aspiration is to be a Russian czar, but, for reasons not worth discussing here, you happen to be trapped in the U.S.? Yes, correct: You build a Soviet-style palace in the place that most closely resembles the motherland: Long Island.

This $100 million, 60,000 square feet property was built by Tamir Sapir, who you may remember as the NYC cab driver turned billionaire who pleaded guilty in 2009 for attempting to import 29 rare dead animals into the U.S. aboard his yacht.

The mansion, which houses 13 bedrooms and 35 bathrooms (!?), also includes a ballroom, several indoor pools, a hair salon, wine vault and tasting room, indoor racquetball court, gym, saunas, steam rooms, spa treatment rooms and two-story built-in doll house.

The current owners bought it in 2013 for $15.85 million. Why they've decided to move is anyone's guess, though it will almost certainly be a downgrade.

Interested in purchasing this modest villa? Click here for more information.