Carson Kressley with straight victim/rescued John Sellers; Photo - NY TimesAs if Gothamist wasn't already jealous of people who get to hang out with the Fab Five of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, John Sellers goes through a mini-gayification for the Times. Damn damn damn. Sellers' abs get prodded, his apartment gets made over, he goes to Craft for lunch, he goes to the salon and then goes shopping. Among what the experts say:

- On Sellers' quilt (from his mom a decade ago): "Unless you're 90 years old and alone in the world, you shouldn't have this bedding."
- On his towels: "reeking of elder-care facility."
- On his bedroom furniture: "like a freebie with a fill-up, right?"
- On his attitude towards clothings: Sellers is "like a frightened bunny, scared and alone in a world of couture."

Sigh, Sellers says they are like "a league of superheroes, the members of the team are each gifted with a special power." We cannot wait for the show, which premieres tomorrow night at 10PM on Bravo.

We're also sorta shocked we don't know John Sellers - he refers to men and women as "dude" (just like us!) and he is fond of "casual and slightly sloppy" clothing - but then again, that describes about 80% of our friends.