MTV, take note: the city's kindergartners are obsessed with the Jersey Shore. Yesterday, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino was at the Borders book store in Midtown, signing copies of what will surely be a Pulitzer contender, "Here’s the Situation: A Guide To Creeping on Chicks, Avoiding Grenades, and Getting In Your GTL on the Jersey Shore." And among those in line were twin 5-year-olds Amanda and Taylor, whose mother brought them all the way from Middle Village to see the "star." “When the girls woke up for school this morning, they asked if today was the day they were going to see The Situation,” their mother, Jennifer Rup, told the Post. “Taylor thinks he’s sexy, and Amanda likes his stomach.” Five-year-olds know what "sexy" is?

Rup says she plans on reading the book to her daughters, but will use "discretion and change some of the words." Besides his really teeny-bopper fans, women were reportedly throwing themselves at him, even though he refused to take pictures with fans. “I’d dip myself in oil and play Slip ’N Slide on him," said Tricia Ross, who the Post notes has a master's degree. Even men love him; one 18-year-old dude said,"He takes fashion risks and doesn’t try to be anybody else." Sure, if you consider aggressive amounts of Affliction a fashion risk.